JOY!

The exam is OVER! It ended yesterday. Was too exhausted to write about it yesterday. Ironically I slept so well the night before and almost didn't make it on time for the exam yesterday! I woke up with a start and saw that the sky was already bright and shiny (for the first time in days as the monsoon has been bringing rain almost daily). Thank God, it was only 7 am! Made it to the exam hall at 8.20 am and I was scheduled for the long case at 8.35am!

My patient for the long case was a sweet chinese lady in her early forties. She only spoke mandarin. Mandarin isn't exactly my forte but she was very accomodating. I explained to her regarding the exam and how much I would appreciate it if she could cooperate with me and help me along. She smiled and said "Ok, I have SLE!!!!". That made my life a lot easier. She then proceeded to tell me the entire history of her illness....all 20 years of it! Poor woman, she has gone through so much! Ms Yew, wherever you are, God bless you!

After an hour I was ushered into a room where 2 examiners were waiting for me. One I know as she is a hematologist where I work. The other is a Dr Leo, another Mat Salleh who stood a whole head taller than me! I presented my findings and we had a pleasant time of Q and A. I think I did fairly well.

After lunch, I went for the short cases, considered by almost all to be the crucial part of the whole exam. Here I had to examine 4 patients in 40 minutes and come out with a diagnosis for each of them based on what I find on examining them and then answer any questions thrown to me.

The first patient I saw was a complete DISASTER! Why? Because I was again being taken by Dato Kew, the one I mentioned earlier! I don't know why, but in her presence, my mind just goes blank and I couldn't think at all. I fumbled through the first case, performing worst than a medical student! I think she must be so disappointed with me. I am disappointed with myself too. The next patient was better as I was now taken by Prof Goh, a neurologist. Still, I felt I could have done better.

After a 5 minute break, I was taken by Prof Tan (a nephrologist) for my 3rd case which went very well. And finally, Prof Azmi, an endocrinologist, took me for my final case which was a breeze. And then, before i knew it, it was OVER! Took some pics of my pal, Sasheela right after the exam. You can see pure JOY! Taking into account she is at that time of the month (how do I know? Well, she told me), the smiles says it all...its just PURE JOY and HAPPINESS!

After the exam, I simply did not know what to do. I didn't have any contigency plan on how to celebrate or release tension. I was seriously contemplating going for a relaxing blind massage at Brickfields but decided against it. Instead I decided to pamper my car instead. My poor car has been neglected due to the exam stress. So I had it washed and polished. Cost me a fortune and I don't even think they did a good job. Doesn't matter, it is definitely cleaner than it used to be.

What did I do last night? I played computer games till my mind went numb and my fingers were sore. And I read all the newspapers that I could find...NST, STAR, SUN...everything. And I cleaned my room (it was looking like a tsunami hit). And I watched TV. And finally I slept. And woke up late again!

The results will be announced today at noon. My tummy has a butterfly farm in it. All fluttering away. I am praying and hoping I will clear this exam. This will be the last exam of my life! My mum has been bugging me. She said, "how long more do you want to study? You have been studying half your life away!". I think she is right. Passing this exam will open many doors of opportunities!

Oh, I have been rambling on and on about this exam. Some of you may not even know what I am talkin about. The exam is for the Masters in Internal Medicine course tha I am in. The exam that i just sat for is the part II (there are 2 parts, the first part was at the end of the first year in the course). Part II is also the FINAL exam of the course. If I pass it, then I am a specialist! The exam is held in end of the 3rd year of the course. There is one more year to go after this. In the final year, I will have to complete a thesis and also choose a field where I will subspecialise in. Right now, as it has always been, I have decided to go into Infections Diseases. I find treating and managing patients with HIV and AIDS most fulfilling. It's something very close to my heart. Sure, i won't be making money in this field but to me, money is secondary.

The minutes are ticking away....noon beckons. Lord, let me PASS!!!!!